Junk’s Repositorium

Well apparently Team GabeN is offering the public a chance to play a beta test of our HL2. Andy and Essel seem to think it’s a swell idea but honestly I don’t know what to think. Sure it’s nice to stir up some excitement about our project. It takes a lot of work to  bring a project (especially a fucking leak fixing project) to the point where you would want people outside of the team to play it. So many leak projects have started and died in the past 5 years that it seems like there is some kind of curse attached to the leak. I don’t really blame any of these projects for failing. Working with the leak is like trying to train a feral monkey to drive a bus. We’ve seen too many projects started up by mod newbies taking on a task that even Valve felt was too ambitious.

There is however a second curse of the leak community. It seems that every active member in the leak community is either a retarded furry asshole, or just a retarded asshole (including all of us assholes on Team GabeN). This is where my main concern about our beta test comes from. Once things go online there is going to be an inevitable influx of grigorifags coming to us with foam at the corners of their mouths panting “THIS SUCKS YOU GUYS SUCK FUCK U.” I can also imagine there being a lot of frustration from those who are not selected for the beta test. Yes, thats right, not everyone who signs up is getting in. This is entirely left to our discretion. I can see those of you out there (you know who you are) who have made it a point not to like us or piss us off, and yet have signed up for our beta. I see your names here on the sign up list, and well, I’m not saying one way or another, but don’t get all surprised and indignant if we happen to pass your name when the keys are given out.

Which brings me to my next point: We owe you people NOTHING. From day one we have dealt with bullshit from incredulous fucking braincramps like you. It got to the point that for a while we were seriously considering never releasing anything at all, instead showing only a series of video walkthroughs of us playing on our fixed leak as a final “fuck you” to all you dicks. So don’t come in here all high and mighty acting like we owe it to you to make your dreams come true. Get in line to suck our cocks and then we’ll talk business.

On that note I’d like to address the concern of playable maps in the beta test. At this point we are planning to initially include one test map in the beta showcasing some of the engine updates and additions we have made, as well as some fancy new architecture. As things progress I may pull a few select maps from our storyline and include them in later patches to the beta test. Now some of you are signing up expecting our whole opening C17 sequence (some even expect the entire leak storyline… fucking dream on)  to be included and playable. Yeah, sorry, but we’re not satisfied enough with it yet to include the whole damn thing. This is not to say that I haven’t been working my ass off on these maps, and I doubt many of you have any idea to what extent I have been updating the opening maps. That fucking Terminal map you all go ga-ga over? I had to rebrush about 60% of it, including reshaping messy architecture, accomodating for func_details, vis leafs, and readding sections from earlier versions of the map, but not including the dozens upon dozens of hint brushes required to make that fucking mess of a map playable. This is not the e3_terminal you all have seen “fixed” a zillion times from other people, this is the terminal to end all terminals. At this point it’s already in a better state than most fixes (it compiles in about 20 minutes on a midrange PC, for one thing), but I am still having a few scripting issues and problems with cubemaps, and so I will hold off on including it until most if not all glaring issues are resolved. I’m also considering including another previously unseen map from the Borealis chapter, but time will tell if that will go through.

I know there is no way we can possibly please everyone but I hope most of you are satisfied with the beta test. It sure beats the fuck out of playing an unpatched anon, so you leak junkies who have a collection of leak models and maps should have little reason to complain. For those of you who love to spit and bitch about everything, we didn’t expect to satisfy you in the first place.

Now go outside and get an ice cream cone, all of you.